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With warmer weather approaching, talk of beach trips among your circle will surely float past you. In gay circles, it’s Marshall’s Beach. Perhaps you’ve never been to Marshall’s Beach. You heard about it from a companion, maybe you’ve wondered where gays keep getting those up-close Golden Gate Bridge selfies. Maybe you just want to be nude on the beach with your friends in the sun. In any case, gay beach etiquette is inherited queer knowledge passed down from hoe to hoe, but I introduce it to you here. 

In addition to your regular beach fare (sunscreen, towels, sunglasses, etc.), you should:

Poop first.

Gross! Well trust me, you will thank yourself. Go even if you don’t have to travel. There are no restrooms on Marshall’s Beach. The closest facilities are a rough mile hike down the shore above family-friendly Baker Beach. No matter what you plan to do with your butt at Marshall’s Beach, transparent the chamber before you get there. You don’t want to find yourself at the bottom of a cliff when last night’s dinner finally drops. On such a tiny strip of land there are no trees or cover of any compassionate, let alone anythi

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